Wednesday, November 10, 2010

The morning of "I don't want to get up yet"

I wrote this way back in February and saw that I never posted it. I laughed and came close to tears at the same time, so I thought it was worth posting.

I will love You, O LORD, my strength. The LORD is my rock and my fortress and my deliverer; My God, my strength, in whom I will trust; My shield and the horn of my salvation, my stronghold. I will call upon the LORD, who is worthy to be praised; So shall I be saved from my enemies. ~Psalm 18:1-3~

It is now 12:45 A.M., a high pitched screech floods the heater vents from down stairs, "Get out!!!" Grouchily I stomp across the floor as I hear 3 little sets of feet scrambling for their beds; "That is ENOUGH!!!" I yell down the stairs, sure that I am going to loose my mind at this point.

"Why, oh Lord, tonight? We have to be up at 5:00 A.M. to take Daddy to work then off to co/op by 9:00. We cannot skip because it is my day to work..."Why tonight Lord?" As soon as Daddy is off work we are heading up to our, "fun filled", cabin in the woods weekend.

I quickly see it all in play in my head, The weekend will be a disaster filled with grouchy, fighting children. Co/Op is going to be a day of horror.

"Don't touch me! I'm telling!!! Moooommy, he won't leave me alone!"

"That is it!!! Go to sleep now, or we aren't going to the cabin!!!!" I stomp off "knowing" that they deserved my grouchiness.

Minutes later I realize that I don't hear fighting. My heart starts to soften. "Oh Lord, forgive me. I am not being the mother you have asked me to be."

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